For Better and Better

30 Things I've Learned in 30 years January 9, 1988- January 9, 2017

1) Remember why you fell in love. It started with just the 2 of you. 2) When things are bad, look for the good. 3) Require a parenting (v.) partner. They need both of you. You need each other. 4) Tell him you love him every time you say goodbye. 5) Make his oatmeal even if you’re running late. Not too many raisins. 6) When you’re lost, find a compass. Ask for directions. 7) The grass isn’t greener. You’re where you’re meant to be. 8)Tell him what you love about him especially when he’s not that lovable. 9) Be willing to walk away from conflict sometimes agreeing to disagree. Get to the other side. Learn from your mistakes so it meant something. 10) Make what matters to him, matter to you. 11) Have each other’s back when it comes to your kids. 12) Hold up a mirror to each other. You picked each other to learn. 13) Show up for the relationship, even when things suck “for better or worse”. 14) Check your ego at the door. Love with your heart not your head. 15) Remind him who he is when he’s forgotten. See who he can't see. 16) Have defined roles in a relationship. He’s the roots, I’m the wings. 17) Lay beside him on the floor when he’s had back surgery twice, “in sickness and health” 18) Speak your truth. Give him time to simmer, when you're boiling. 19) Take out the trash even though it’s his job and don’t mention it. 20) Give your marriage what it deserves. It’s a 100/100 commitment. Don’t keep score. 21) Belly laugh. Cuddle. Hug. Be silly. Have sweet nicknames. 22) Know who he is and who he isn’t. Know who you are and who you're not. 23) People fall asleep at the wheel. Keep each other awake. 24) Know what you need. Ask for it if you’re not getting it. 25) Hold hands when you walk. Reach for his hand first. 26) Be willing to listen when he registers a complaint. Give it due consideration. 27) Grass is green where it’s watered. Take care of the relationship. 28) Love out loud. 29) Be best friends. 30) Live by example. Show your children how to love.